Episode 15
THE BROTHEL AT THE BEWITCHING HOUR 12.00 midnight
Tram siding-tracks with danger signals stretch along Mabbot Street at the entrance to the red light district of Dublin. Decrepit characters are everywhere. A deaf mute is being teased by children, a drunk snores against a dustbin, a child clutches the skirts of an old witch and two watchmen stand by in their capes. Men swear and sluts call and sing bawdy songs.
Private Carr and Private Compton stagger along in uniform releasing a volley of farts and flirt with Cissy Caffrey.
Stephen conducts himself in a joyful chant with his ashplant. Lynch walks along beside him with scorn on his face. Sluts try to get their attention with bawdy calls but Stephen oblivious just keeps singing. Edy Boardman and Bertha Supple crouch in shawls and gossip together. Stephen scatters the light of a lamp with his ashplant and the white spaniel on his trail is kicked aside by Lynch. Stephen postulates a theory about gesture and rhythm as a universal language and when Lynch derides him for such thoughts in Mabbot Street Stephen reminds him that Shakespeare and Socrates were both brought to book by women. Stephen tries to find a gesture that will link the loaf and the jug and Lynch frustrated hands him back his stick. They walk on towards the abode of Georgina Johnson, and Tommy and Jack Caffrey - the twins from the beach - climb a gas lamp. The river fog rises and a navvy staggers by carrying a lamp and ejecting snot from a nostril. Bloom appears breathless stuffing bread and chocolate into his pockets. The mirrors in a shop window provide distorted reflections. Bloom slips into Antonio Rabaiotti ‘s doorway and a moment later enters Olhousen’s and buys a pig’s crubeen that is still warm and a sheep’s trotter. He stops to catch his breath and sees a fire brigade way in the distance and notes the blaze is in the other direction from his own house. Bloom almost gets knocked over, as he darts across the foggy street, a man screeches to a halt and sounds the gong loudly as he jumps onto the curb stone. Bloom determines to stay fit and feels he was saved by a lucky charm, given him by his mother, which he now touches in his pocket. Another close shave and he feels a little light in the head. Bloom is saluted by a figure in a sombrero, side steps a rag seller and when he is almost knocked over by Tommy and Jack Caffrey he warily checks his pockets. Rudolf Virag appears in an ancient caftan from Zion with streaks of poison coming from his mouth. Bloom frantically hides the pork trotters as he listens to a barrage of family values stretching back to the house of Abraham and Jacob. Ellen Bloom appears with cameo broach and hairnet and goes into hysterics when she sees the state of her son who stands before her with downcast eyes. A familiar voice startles him. Molly in turkish pantaloons and yashmak demands that he defer to her and call her Mrs Marion. Bloom grovels and Molly adorned in gold chains scolds him in Moorish as her camel brings her mangoes to eat. Molly mocks Bloom for being a stick in the mud and he vouches to return to Sweeny’s chemist for her lotion. She strolls off disdainful of Bloom and humming Don Giovanni.
An old bawd yells out offering maidenhead at bargain prices. Gerty comes by and chastises Bloom. Mrs Breen comes by catching him in the act and as Molly’s friend is sure to report back that she has seen him. Bloom lies that he is a social worker for fallen women.
Two black and white minstrels do a song and dance routine. Bloom tries to coax Mrs Breen with old romantic memories. He lies that he is returning from watching Mrs Bandman Palmer playing Hamlet. Ritchie Goulding with legal bag and Pat the waiter from the Ormond Hotel make a brief appearance. Bloom pretends to confide in Mrs Breen a huge secret that she had been ill advised by Molly in relation to the hat she wore to the Leopardstown races. Bloom really did prefer Mrs Breen’s style but as memories of Molly laughing flood his mind Mrs Breen fades away. A woman crouches for a piss.
A gaffer inadvertently uses a bucket full of porter for the plasterers as a chamber pot. Whores call from every doorway. Bloom has virtually no chance of finding Stephen and has risked life and limb chasing him down here. A lewd piece of graffiti catches his attention and a retriever’s nose finds the trotters in his pocket. He begs for some and Bloom too tired to bother anymore gives him the lot.
Bloom declares himself a doer of good deeds to the Watchman. He derides the treatment of animals in the circus. The Watchman however just wants his name and address and when his Henry Flower business card drops from his hat Bloom tries his best with ‘jolly good fellow’ conversation to keep his identity secret. The Dark Mercury announces that Dublin Castle is looking for him. The Watchman orders him to go to the station with him.
Bloom declares his membership of a secret society by making the sacred signal. Bloom pleads mistaken identity and that he has been wrongfully condemned. Martha comes forward and accuses him of breach of promise. Bloom pleads his case to the Jury and declares his good wife is the daughter of Major General Brian Tweedy. He describes his occupation and Myles Crawford a character witness answers the telephone calling the Freeman’s Journal a urinal. Philip Beaufoy accuses Bloom of the most blatant plagiarism and that he has not even been to University. He disregards Bloom’s comment about the University of Life and shows the court the most damning evidence. All in the gallery jeer and call out anti-Semitic remarks. Mr Beaufoy starts to expound on Mr Bloom’s despicable personal life. Mary Driscoll, a scullery maid, accuses Bloom of sexual harassment but he says he gave her garters way above her station in life. Bloom makes a false statement in his defense and declares his intention to reform, in spite of the neglect of an erring and absent father, he is determined to turn over a new leaf. He describes memories of reciting the family rosary. The Press Gallery complain that they are having difficulty hearing the proceedings. Bloom is then cross examined about a plasterers bucket and his frock coat is full of white stains and his nose is bandaged as he continues inaudibly to address the court. The barrister J.J. O’Molloy insists his client be treated with dignity as is warranted in a court of justice. He describes him as a poor refugee who had to start all over from scratch and the misdemeanor was purely cultural mumbo jumbo as such acts were permitted in the land of the Pharaoh. No actual intimacy occurred and being of Mongolian extraction he could not be responsible for his actions. Bloom barefoot breaks into pigeon English. J.J.O’ Molly brings to order a court gone wild and asserts that the law of the jungle has been superceded by the ‘mosaic code’ and in fact Bloom treated this young hussy as if she was his own daughter and is the epitome of bashfulness and modesty. Unfortunate circumstances have forced Bloom to mortgage his properties in Asia Minor. Moses Dlugacz stands up in the gallery holding an orange and a pork kidney.
J.J.O’Molloy’s demeanor becomes grave and he holds his left lapel and when he speaks he has almost lost his voice. He apologizes for his poor health and reminds the jury that the benefit of the doubt is an honored tradition. Bloom can make available excellent references and casually mentions his afternoon spent at the Vice Regal lodge.
Mrs Yelverton Barry arrives in evening gown and gloves and demands that Bloom be arrested for writing the most suggestive letters and making improper suggestions inflamed further by offering to send her a work by Monsieur Paul de Kock.
Mrs Bellingiham comes forward to accuse Bloom of closing her carriage door and then sending letters full of lewd compliments with the stated intention of getting her to sully her marriage vows.
The Hon Mrs Mervyn Talboys in riding cap and brandishing a whip confirms similar atrocities on the polo ground and in fact has retained his disgusting photograph of a muscular torero ravaging a nude senorita. Bloom wants to be lashed for his abominable behavior whereupon The Hon Mrs Mervyn Talboy offers to do so within an inch of his life. Bloom pleads for leniency. The Hon Mrs Mervyn Talboy will show no mercy to this cuckold and whip in hand asks that his trousers be pulled down.
A list of all the cuckolds has been published and the priests’ clock goes Cuckoo.
The jury consists of all the familiar Dublin faces from Martin Cunningham to Nosey Flynn and the Nameless One who immediately lays bare his suspicions about Boylan and Molly.
Sir Frederick Falkiner in stony garb and graybeard vows to put an end to white slave traffic and sentences the accused to be hanged by the neck. The bells of St George ring out: Heigho! Heigho!
Bloom in desperation turns to Hynes to vouch for him but he refuses to acknowledge him as anyone but a total stranger. Paddy Dignam comes from the grave and verifies that Bloom was at the funeral and reminds everyone to keep his wife away from the bottle of sherry. Tom Rochford makes a daredevil rescue and as Bloom plods forward kisses flutter all around him.
Zoe Higgins a young whore in her slip comes forward to greet Bloom and he tries to ascertain if this is the brothel where Stephen has gone. Zoe playing tickles finds something hard in his trousers only to be handed a shriveled potato, Bloom’s lucky charm. Zoe beguiles Bloom by linking his arm and humming to the music. She wants a cigarette and Bloom starts to make a speech about tobacco and Sir Walter Raleigh. Bloom, Mayor of Dublin, will run a tramline from the cattle mart to the river. Prominent people shake his hand and organize for his speech to be printed at rate payers expense. A street is named after him. Bloom vows to fight against the needless introduction of machinery. The route of the procession is thronged with well wishers cheering and a drum band and civic flag add colour to the great civic occasion.
Citizens raise their hats as the great man goes by and women and bishops praise his leadership qualities. Bloom dons a ruby ring and stands on the stone of destiny and Church bells ring all over Dublin.
Bloom’s words are being relayed around the world and he greets his subjects. He then proceeds to change spouses and when the Princess Selene arrives there is a great cheer. Parnell’s brother gives Bloom his blessing as the new Chief of Ireland. Bloom promises to lead his people into the new Bloomusalem. A crystal palace with forty thousand rooms is erected and when Macintosh accuses Bloom of being a fraud he is executed on the spot. All dissenters meet the same fate. Great innovations come into being and women bring their babies to be kissed by Bloom. He embraces all his citizens and opens a special office giving free medical and legal advice. Bloom pledges to reform the municipal morals and to bring about religious tolerance. Every child is guaranteed access to nature and there will be electric dishwashers in every house. Universal sisterhood and brotherhood in a world of free money and free love and a free lay church. There will also be painless obstetrics and astronomy for the people. Good citizens are shocked and Father Farley thinks it will mark the end of holy faith. Theodore Purefoy accuses Bloom of using a device that interferes with the sacred duty to procreate. A mass suicide of women follows this disclosure. Alexander J. Downie accuses Bloom of doing the devil’s work and of being as treacherous as the white bull in the Apocalypse. The crowd is ready to lynch him and everything gets thrown at him that is of no commercial value.
Bloom pleads innocent and charges his brother who is his double for this whole debacle.
Malachi Mulligan leads a team of medical experts in giving evidence. Bloom demonstrates bisexual tendencies and has just escaped from a lunatic asylum. In spite of wanton tendencies a detailed examination of his anal and pubic hairs show him to be virgo intacta.
Dr Dixon suggests Bloom is the new womanly man, gentle and frugal in his habits. He asks for clemency on the basis that he is going to have a baby.
A wealthy American raises money with a special collection for Bloom. He clutches Nurse Thornton tightly while he gives birth to eight male yellow and white children who are fluent in five languages. Immediately they are appointed around the world in executive positions. Bloom as the new Messiah is challenged to perform a miracle or at least forecast the winner of the Saint Leger. Bloom completes several superhuman feats and manages to transform his face into that of a number of historical personages. Brini, Papal Nuncio traces an unbroken line from Bloom all the way back to Moses. There are however skeletons in the closet and Bloom blushes and asks to be spared his past. Bloom sits cross-legged having grown asses ears and girls and boys skip around him in opposite directions. Bloom is pelted with stones and defiled as the great prophet foretold.
The daughters of Erin pray for Him with six hundred voices singing the Alleluia chorus.
Bloom wearing a tweed cap is heading back out into the wilds of Connemara with only a black pig for a companion. He has been given a belting and so bids farewell to the woman of the house. Zoe is a Yorkshire lass, and, becoming bored with Bloom’s doddering around, suggests a bit of saucy action that will earn a whore ten shillings. She invites him in to see the new pianola and more of herself. Bloom feeling her bosom is glowing in anticipation. Molly would be jealous but reassured by Zoe he starts to view her ample bosom as an enthusiastic baby and reverts to babbling as he counts the bronze buckles.
Zoe lures him inside with a heady mixture of perfume and rustling silk. The male brutes that have already had their turn grovel in the dung. Bloom is frightened to trip and fall like the just man and so he hops over the threshold. A man with an ape’s gait crosses the upstairs landing with a hot water bottle. Bloom follows Zoe quickly into the music room. Mauve tissue softens the lights of the chandelier and there is a mosaic floor criss-crossed with footmarks. Lynch sits by a fire grate in which are peacock feathers and beats time to the music. Kitty a skinny whore with dyed red hair is resting against the edge of the table. She swings her legs and excuses her hiccups.
Zoe turns up the gas lamp. Stephen is absorbed in repeating a series of notes at the pianola with his hat and ashplant resting on top. Florry Talbot a chubby lazy blond lounges back on some pillows in a tattered pink gown.
Lynch toys with Kitty’s boa, which has glided from her shoulders, like a feathered reptile. Stephen glances at Lynch. He is struggling to complete a thought process within the construct of music. He corrects a slip of the tongue in which he says Circe’s instead of Ceres’ altar as he tries to link knowledge, divinity and music. Lynch’s cap cuts across his concentrated efforts with a bitter and dismissive mimic of a female comment that shows no aptitude for abstract formatting of thought. Stephen notes that Lynch does not support his struggle but only points out his mistakes. Stephen works on the notion of a musical interval as an ellipse and this creating the longest interval between the fundamental and the dominant. A blast of ‘The Holy City’ comes through the window and Stephen hastily tries to conclude that in traversing the earth one in effect can only have traversed oneself within a concept of microcosm and macrocosm which holds the equation of what one will become in life.
Lynch with a mocking grin looks towards Zoe and Bloom. Zoe does not conspire with the ridicule and is respectful of Stephen’s intelligent discourse.
Florry Talbot makes an inane comment about the last day being forecast for this summer and Kitty is shocked at the news. Zoe now mocks Florry who tells her it was in the paper. The newsboys are heard announcing the arrival of the Antichrist.
Stephen seeing Bloom directs his summation about the octave towards him.
Reuben J. Antichrist, a wandering Jew, trudges forward with dishonoured bills stuffed in his pockets. His only son drenched from his dip in the Liffey hangs from a long boat hook. Punch Costello somersaults by as a hunchbacked hobgoblin and declares he is the Messiah and his lifeless jaws chatter, as he kangaroo hops, then whirls into a dervish dance. He juggles the planets until they glide away. Florry leaking an unpleasant odour blesses herself as she worries about the end of the world. The gramophone blasts out Jerusalem. The bursting of a rocket firework proclaims the second coming and Elijah arrives on an infinite and invisible tight-rope crossing the sky to the End of the World. The Three Legs of Man whirls through the gloomy darkness dressed in the tartans of a fisherman’s attendant. The End Of The World rouses everyone in Scottish accent to dance the keel. Elijah perspiring in his surplice is connecting people through on a trunk line to eternity junction. He tries to link them with cosmic forces and the right vibrations for a joyride to heaven. A.J. Christ Downie offers an alternative route via seventy seven west sixty ninth street. He conducts a hearty rendition of Jerusalem that gets drowned out by the Gramophone’s version of Whoreusalem. An American black faced Elijah calls, with arms raised, to Mr President in whom he believes to help save the whores with hearts of gold.
Kitty confesses to having erred on Constitution Hill. Zoe is unrepentant and declares it all great fun. Florry blames the port wine. Stephen tries to make sense of it all and states that it all began with the word and the end is to be found in a world without end. When he evokes the eight beatitudes his eight drinking companions from Holles Street hospital arrive in white surgical gowns marching along in goose step.
Mr. Best from the library has his hair in curl papers and is accompanied by John Eglington in a kimono and he tries to link his efforts to beautify him to literature. He confuses Yeats and Keats as he fumbles with the gist of a quote about a thing of beauty being a joy forever. John Eglinton flashing a green lantern wants the unadorned truth, plain and simple. The green light catches Mananaan MacLir behind a coalscuttle and he rises slowly with his druid cloak shifting a cold sea breeze. Eels wriggle around his head and he holds a crayfish and a bicycle pump in his hands. He warns against exotic cults and his voice of waves and whistling seaweed becomes the smiting cry of storm birds. The green light turns to mauve and as the gas starts to whistle Zoe goes to adjust the chandelier. Lynch lifts her slip to show a beauty spot on her bare backside as she reaches up to the flames to light a cigarette. She teases Bloom who sits twirling his thumbs. Lipoti Virag slides down the chimney wearing a macintosh and carrying a roll of parchment. Bloom’s grandfather delights in the promiscuous flaunting of nakedness and proceeds to cast his expert eye on the lingerie, warning of the pitfalls of being deceived by mere finery. Bloom has to regretfully confess his impotence in the midst of such a selection of womanly flesh. Virag’s efforts to rally his spirit for a good romp are to no avail and he explores a possible fetish for blubbery buttocks. They discuss the help of diet especially wheat meal, honey and nutmeg. Virag consults the index of his roll of parchment and some new ideas emerge including starvation, cross-dressing and eating pomegranates. Bloom looks from the three whores to the mauve light. Virag elaborates on the sex life of insects. Virag opens ‘Fundamentals of Sexology’ and scans through bees and Spanish flies before coming to Redbank oysters as the ultimate aphrodisiac. Bloom is absorbed in his own thoughts about women’s natural aversion to creepy-crawlies contradicting the attraction of Eve to the serpent but notes that snakes do have a propensity for drinking milk. Instinct rules the world with ants in similar fashion sucking on the juice of plants. Virag is mesmerized as he watches a moth attracted to the mauve shade of the light, as though it is a pretty petticoat.
Henry Flower arrives in plumed Sombrero. Playing a guitar and licking his lips he starts to sing ‘there is a flower that bloometh’ in a low romantic voice. Stephen thinks of his father as he sits at the piano and imitates his pose playing with his eyes shut. He must telegraph Deasy about resigning his job as school teacher. Almidano Artifoni arrives with a baton and a roll of music. Philip Drunk and Philip Sober, two Oxford dons wearing Mathew Arnold masks appear as Siamese twins. Philip Sober calculates Stephen’s wages and adds up what he has spent on drink at Mooney’s and Burke’s. Phillip Drunk tells him to go to hell - he paid his way – and, wanting to work out about octaves, tries to recall Swinburne. Florry harps on about a song and wants to know if Stephen is out of Maynooth. Stephen thinks he is well and truly out of it now. Zoe mentions a priest that visited a few nights ago who tried to hide his Roman collar. Virag who is an expert on the sex secrets of monks and maidens thinks it perfectly natural, as he would be an expert on the fall of man. Virag elaborates on men and women as primitive animals.
Zoe puffing smoke through her nose says the priest’s visit was not so successful and Bloom empathizes with his plight. Virag taking on a diabolic countenance foretells of the Apocalypse. Kitty and Virag talk of horrific experiences of gonorrhea. Lynch’s comment about inoculated apes causes Virag to mimic copulating whilst crying like a baboon. Ben Jumbo Dollard arrives with a long beard wearing a tight bathing suit. Nurse Callan and Nurse Quigly lurch towards him as he sings in ‘base barrreltone’ with calls of ‘Big Ben! Be MacChree!”
Henry Flower serenades the severed head of a female resting on his breast. Virag shedding his skin like a snake and knocking his jaw closed with a roll of parchment bids everyone farewell. Henry Flower slings his guitar over his shoulder and follows Virag out as he unscrews his head and pops it under his arm. Stephen suggests to Zoe she might have preferred another style of cleric such as a Methodist and advises her to avoid Antisthenes and Arius Heresiarchus. Floory’s comment that Stephen must be a spoiled priest leads to jokes about a Cardinal’s son and Cardinal sin. Cardinal Simon Dedalus comes through the doorway with a red train being held in place by seven dwarflike cardinal sins. A corkscrew cross hangs at the end of a rosary of corks. Cardinal Dedalus is unable to uphold his pompous demeanor and breaks into laughter singing a ditty. He scratches the midgets that have infested his robe. He quickly blesses all present and dances off singing as he goes. A door handle squeaks and a male figure is seen on the staircase. Bloom discreetly pushes the hall door half shut as he gets chocolate from his pocket. He is concerned that it might be Blazes Boylan. Zoe nibbles some chocolate and Lynch opens his mouth to catch some as she tosses a piece in his direction. Kitty tells of excellent chocolate she enjoyed with the engineer at the bazaar. Bloom works a spell to make the man in the hallway disappear and a male cough is heard passing out onto the street. Bloom relaxes and Zoe hands him some chocolate that he eats. A clacking of heels in the hallway announces the arrival of the Madame of the Brothel. Bella Cowen enters cooling herself with a black fan.
She declares she is sweating like a pig by way of greeting and the fan immediately identifies Bloom as a henpecked husband. Bloom cowers before the impressive female and uses the metaphor of an unposted letter in the general post office of life to describe his dilemma. He talks about his father sleeping with his faithful dog Athos at the end of his life. Bloom intimidated by the tapping fan realizes he no longer carries his talisman for protection. He notices Bella’s unraveled bootlace and offers his services. Bella lifts her plump leather hoof onto a chair and he gently undoes the laces. Bloom eulogizes about lacing women’s shoes as the great dream of his life. The hoof warns Bloom not to make the laces too tight or he will get a well-directed kick. Bloom infatuated starts to mumble and Bella breaks into a baritone voice and in manly voice orders him down on his hands and knees like a pig. Bello puts his hands in the pockets of his breeches and threatens Bloom to use his heels like spurs to break her in and make her tremble. Bloom hides under the sofa protected by Zoe and Florry. Bello coaxes her out for a little punishment but when the helpless female Bloom steps forward Bello grabs her savagely by the hair. Bloom faints at the sight of all the sadomasochistic instruments. Bello threatens to eat her for breakfast and when the female Bloom screams Bello slaps her across the face and gets the whores to hold her down while he squats over her. Mrs Keogh appears with rolling pin offering her services. Bello as stock broker smokes a cigar and squats on Bloom’s face whilst reading the share prices, and, disgusted with Throwaway’s win on the racing pages, stubs out his cigar on Bloom’s ear. Bello rides Bloom like a racehorse and squeezes his testicles to encourage his mount to break into a gallop. Florry and Zoe want to have a ride as well. Bello uncorks her behind and she lets out a loud fart. Bloom realizes he has become a woman. Bello dresses ‘her’ in silk and promises corsets laced with vice like force. Bloom confesses that he did try on Molly’s petticoats and lingerie but only once. Bello reminds her of the outrageous outfits bought from Mrs Marian Dandrake at the Shelbourne Hotel. Bloom defends disclosure of his fantasies of being Mrs Marion and being violated by a string of distinguished men, by disclosing his experiences in the school play, with dear Gerard. Bello further chides her with the pleasure of flouncing out a dress in order to take a seat. Bello directs Bloom to the sawdust in the corner. The Sins of the Past range from a clandestine marriage to graffiti in public toilets and smelling the used toilet paper of a harlot. Bello insists on all the demeaning details of every obscene act. The imperious Bello orders Bloom to wash undergarments and clean out the latrines and empty all the chamber pots or lap up the hot liquid like fine champagne. At night, Bloom will don long gloves, wear perfume and swell out her bust to entertain the gentlemen. Bello demonstrates the merchandise by plunging an elbow into Bloom’s vagina. Bello then conducts an auction and calls for advances on two shillings. Bloom learns to walk in four inch high heels and to straighten the seam of the silk stockings. Bloom learns coquettish behavior hiding her blushes and popping her forefinger in her mouth. Bello regards him as an impotent specimen and tells him that this is all he is good for, and his position at Eccles Street has been taken over by a full blooded man and Molly already has a red haired child kicking in her womb. Bloom calls for the police and then calls for Molly to forgive him. He has been asleep for twenty years. Bloom thinks he sees Molly through the window of Matt Dillon’s but it is their daughter. Milly is wearing a blue scarf and is arm and arm with her lover. Bello reminds Bloom that his past life is well gone and the women he tormented with leering grunts are now ramsacking his house breaking his little statue and tearing pages from his astronomy book. Bloom crawls along holding a knife in his mouth determined to redeem the situation. Bello tells him he should kick the bucket and she will help him with some rare wine mixture if he wills her all his money. Bloom can be buried with her ten or eleven husbands and will make good flower manure. Bloom’s tears bring no sympathy and he is veiled for sacrifice. Dark figures stand by the wailing wall and with swaying arms they wail over the lost sinner Bloom.
A nymph with hair flowing comes out of an oak frame as incense wafts from the smoke of the pyre. The Nymph salutes Bloom “Mortal!” and thanks him for taking her from the abuse of her image in the world of advertising and placing her in a frame above his marriage bed. Bloom was glad to praise her sacred beauty.
The Nymph derides his idea of praise when all she heard was snoring and farting and blocks her ears. She covers her eyes in embarrassment at an image of the chamber pot breaking under Molly. The Waterfall and the Yews join in and remember Bloom as a schoolboy when he was so easily aroused on school excursions. The young football teams join in the sport and dare each other to ring all the bells in Montague Street. The Waterfall and the Yews tell their young secrets to the Nymph who points at him for shame. Bloom was tempted by the wild spirit of Lotty Clarke when he had spied her naked through his father’s opera glasses. A Nanny goat tells of other atrocious escapades among the rhododendrons at Howth Head. Councilor Nannetti makes a speech from the helm of Erin’s King out on Dublin Bay. The Nymph from the lofty heights of immortality declares an absence of need for any orifice or pubic hair as she eats only electric light. Bloom is miserable as he recalls the enemas administered and his homage to the lower portions of a woman’s body. Kitty Flory and Zoe make suggestive comments from the thickets. Bloom admits to being overwhelmed, unable even to sit down on a seat still warm after being vacated by a woman. The Waterfall continues to fall and the leaves of the Yews whisper to their sister the nymph.
The Nymph dressed in a nun’s white habit says with a remote expression in her eyes that she has transcended desire and there is now only the ethereal. On Bloom’s trousers a button snaps off which causes two sluts to yell loudly a bawdy ditty about the pin of his drawers and this breaks the spell of the nymph. Bloom in turn attacks with venom the idea of the ethereal. Such sacrilege and his attempts to sully a pure woman outrage the Nymph. She goes to strike him with a cat of nine tails but Bloom moves quickly to restrain her and clutches her veil and ridicules her about perverted sexual ideals.
The Nymph flees unveiled and a terrible stench escapes as the plaster begins to crack. Bloom is irate that she has managed to fool him for sixteen years. Bloom then turns on Bella Cohen and tells her to dress her age and to eat onions to help her complexion and to do something to add sparkle to her eyes. Bella disdainfully tells Bloom he is not game but he with equal contempt attacks her as the receptacle of semen from a bully and that she should go and wipe herself. When Bloom identifies her patron she is shocked and tries to change the subject and turns to the piano. Zoe bangs chords on the piano emulating a marching song. Bloom gently asks Zoe to return his talisman given to him by his mother. Zoe with a little strip tease unrolls the potato from her garter. Bella trying to reassert authority reprimands Zoe and wants to know who is paying and Stephen politely hands her a gold coin. Bella calculates the cost of three whores and while the others squabble over money at the table Stephen, abhorred, stays at the pianola. Bloom prevents Bella from cheating everyone and returns a pound note to Stephen. When coins fall out of his pocket Bloom undertakes to mind his money. Stephen doesn’t care a damn and asks for a cigarette and asks about Georgina Johnson. He has broken his glasses so he lights his cigarette with difficulty. Georgina has married a customer and gone to London. Bloom wants Stephen to eat some food and wishes he had not given away those morsels to the dog. Zoe tries her hand at palm reading with Stephen. When Lynch slaps Kitty on the behind Father Dolan jumps out of the piano offering to flog Stephen for breaking his glasses. Stephen enjoys the caress of Zoe’s hand and Bloom reaches out a hand for his turn. Zoe tells him he will travel beyond the sea and when he tells her she is wrong she quickly calls his bluff by asking him if henpecked husband is wrong. Bloom says the weal on his hand happened sixteen years ago when he was twenty two. Stephen makes the connection with his own age. Blazes Boylan in straw boater and Lenehan in yachtsman’s cap go by in a hackney car. Bronze and gold headed Lydia Douce and Mina Kennedy look out the window on Ormond Street. Boylan offers Lenehan his forefinger to smell and Lenehan suggestively declares lobster and mayonnaise. Zoe and Florry giggle together. Boylan calls to Bloom who is dressed as a door man to announce his arrival to his wife. Bloom leads him to Molly who welcomes ‘Raoul’ as she splashes in her bath. They agree to let Bloom watch and Molly will organize a prostitute to come and flail her masochistic husband. The whores and barmaids all join Bloom as voyeurs and as Boylan and Molly start to groan sexually Bloom cheers them on to a dramatic climax. Stephen and Bloom gaze in the mirror and the face of a beardless Shakespeare looks out at them.
Mrs Dignam, flushed with sherry and tears, hurries by with the widow’s insurance policy followed by a brood of children. The bearded face of Martin Cunningham replaces Shakespeare and his Merry Widow wears a kimono. Stephen recalls Queen Pasiphae’s lust for a prize bull resulting in his ancestor Dedalus building the first confession box. Lynch tells the whores that Stephen is back from Paris and in response to Zoe’s request Stephen tells them of all the intrigues of a Paris brothel. Stephen has made a strike for freedom and defies anyone to break his spirit. Simon Dedalus tries to encourage him. The wallpaper comes to life with a hunt in full swing chasing a fox. A phantom horse charges past the winning post leaving behind a great field including Zinfandel and Sceptre. Cock of the North is ridden by Garrett Deasy. He has replaced the whip with a hockey stick, and jeers to get down and push are heard.
Zoe overhears Private Carr and Compton and Cissy Caffrey singing Yorkshire Lass and leaps excitedly to put coins in the pianola. Professor Goodwin sits on the piano stool and Zoe twirls herself around to the music. Stephen throws his ashplant on the table and quickly grabs Zoe by the waist and they waltz around the room. Professor Magninni in patent pumps and canary gloves arrives deftly kicking his silk hat onto his head and comments on the poetry of motion. The morning and noon hours dance with each other bowing and turning as they catch the sunlight in the mirrors. Zoe and Stephen turn boldly and Maginni calls the dance as they weave a pattern on the floor until Zoe is giddy from the swirling and collapses on a chair. Stephen seizes Florry and the twilight and night hours join the dance. Kitty jumps up and runs to Stephen and Zoe and Florry dance together. Stephen passes Kitty to Lynch and begins to whirl and waltz with his ashplant. He does frog splits in the middle of some high kicks. Simon Dedalus tells him to think of his mother’s people and Stephen moves into the dance of death whirling until he feels giddy and dizzy and sees stars. He stops dead. An emaciated image of the corpse of his mother appears in a torn bridal veil. A choir sings and Buck Mulligan declares her beastly dead. Stephen is awestruck at the horrific image of his once beautiful mother. Tears of butter drop from Mulligan’s eyes onto the scones as he accuses Stephen of killing his mother. Stephen terrified and full of remorse says cancer was to blame. The mother with green bile coming from her mouth tells Stephen he sang a song about Love’s bitter mystery. She calls on a mother’s love to plead with him to pray and to repent. Stephen moves back from her ghoulish image. The Mother continues to talk loving words to her first born son. Zoe and Florry see he has gone white and Bloom opens the window to let in some air. The Mother warns Stephen about the fires of hell if he does not repent and reaches out to put the fear of God in him. A crab with malignant eyes reaches claws towards Stephen’s heart. Stephen choked with rage swears and determines not to give in and to have all or nothing. He will not serve. The Mother chants a prayer for his soul. Stephen challenges them all to try and break his spirit. The Mother pleads for Christ to have mercy on Stephen. In desperation he strikes out with his ashplant and smashes the chandelier.
Lynch restrains Stephen as Bella calls for the police. Stephen drops his ashplant and flees onto the street. Lynch, Zoe and Kitty chase after him. Bella grabs Bloom’s coat tail and demands payment for the broken lamp. Bloom picks up the ashplant saying she has taken enough. Bloom pulls the chain and the gas lamp comes back on again with only the chimney broken and that is worth no more than sixpence. Bella is obstreperous until Bloom frightens her with knowledge of her son at Oxford. He drops a shilling on the table and leaves.
The whores watch from the door. Corney Kelleher arrives in a hackney car with two lechers. Bloom slips away to avoid being seen but a bloodhound has picked up his scent and chase is given by all and sundry.
Bloom stops at Beaver Street completely out of breath. Stephen is in a drunken row with Private Carr and Crompton who have been told that Stephen has pestered Cissy Caffrey. Bloom holds onto Stephen who almost falls over as he discusses his dilemma as an artist to kill priest and king. Private Carr interprets this as insulting his King and challenges Stephen to repeat the insult. King Edward the Seventh appears with an image of the Sacred Heart on his shirt with royal insignia and undertakes to oversee the fight.
Private Carr is prepared to die for King and country and Stephen with no king asks that his country die for him but then with urgency decides he does not want his country to die and calls out for Live to the chant of long live the king. Private Crompton calls out impatiently from the sidelines for Carr to kick Stephen in the crotch. Bloom tries to intervene and calm everyone down and tells them Stephen is not being malicious, rather he is too drunk to know what he is saying to anyone. .
A medley of comments are heard from Biddy and Clap and the Citizen. Rumbold the hangman wants to show gruesome souvenirs. The Croppy Boy hangs and as sperm gushes forth on the footpath Mrs Bellingham, Mrs Yelverton Barry and Mrs Mervyn Talbot rush forward to mop it up with their handkerchiefs. Major Tweedy and the Citizen compare war trophies.
Private Carr is outraged by the insult to his King. Cissy Coffrey thinks they are fighting for her honour. Bloom irate with Cissy Caffrey asks her to speak out and shakes her by the shoulders. Voices shout fire and police. Pandemonium breaks loose and the clergy try to cope with the mayhem of blood dripping and hairy buttocks going on display. The voice of All the Damned and The Voice of all the Blessed are heard from on high. Private Carr begins to swear aggressively and Bloom tries to get Stephen away. Cissy Caffrey pulls Private Carr away but he suddenly turns and strikes Stephen in the face and he falls to the ground. Private Carr and Crompton try to split before the police arrive but forced to explain they say Stephen insulted Cissy and assaulted them. Bloom declares himself a witness and that Private Carr struck Stephen without being provoked. Bloom spots Corney Kelleeher with the car and gets him to come to the rescue. Corney laughs it all off as harmless fun. Bloom thanks the policeman for not creating a scandal for the son of a highly respected citizen. Corny Kelleher and Bloom declare themselves innocent bystanders with wives at home and in no need of the local service. The horse neighs in response to Bloom’s lies. Corney offers to give Stephen a lift home but Bloom thinks Stephen lives in Sandycove, which is the other direction. Corney Kelleher heads off and Bloom bends over Stephen and hears him mumbling to himself. Bloom watches over him holding his hat and ashplant.
Bloom notices that Stephen is the image of his deceased mother. He does not know that what Stephen is mumbling is his farewell song to his mother. Bloom holds silent vigil. A boy of eleven walks slowly along by the wall dressed in an Eton suit and reads from right to left. Bloom looks in wonder and calls noiselessly his name, Rudy! The boy smiles but is oblivious to Bloom. He holds a slim ivory cane and a white lambskin peeps out of his pocket.